diff --git a/code/__DEFINES/language.dm b/code/__DEFINES/language.dm
index e4c4041a3dd..8fb5ea91ff7 100644
--- a/code/__DEFINES/language.dm
+++ b/code/__DEFINES/language.dm
@@ -2,6 +2,7 @@
 #define LANGUAGE_JAPANESE "Japanese"
 #define LANGUAGE_CHINESE "Chinese"
 #define LANGUAGE_RUSSIAN "Russian"
+#define LANGUAGE_RUSPATOIS "Russian Patois"
 #define LANGUAGE_GERMAN "German"
 #define LANGUAGE_SPANISH "Spanish"
 #define LANGUAGE_TSL "Tactical Sign Language"
@@ -16,7 +17,7 @@
 
 #define LANGUAGE_TELEPATH "Telepath Implant"
 
-#define ALL_HUMAN_LANGUAGES list(LANGUAGE_ENGLISH, LANGUAGE_JAPANESE, LANGUAGE_CHINESE, LANGUAGE_RUSSIAN, LANGUAGE_GERMAN, LANGUAGE_SPANISH)
+#define ALL_HUMAN_LANGUAGES list(LANGUAGE_ENGLISH, LANGUAGE_JAPANESE, LANGUAGE_CHINESE, LANGUAGE_RUSSIAN, LANGUAGE_GERMAN, LANGUAGE_SPANISH, LANGUAGE_RUSPATOIS)
 
 #define ALL_SYNTH_LANGUAGES list(LANGUAGE_ENGLISH, LANGUAGE_JAPANESE, LANGUAGE_CHINESE, LANGUAGE_RUSSIAN, LANGUAGE_GERMAN, LANGUAGE_SPANISH, LANGUAGE_YAUTJA, LANGUAGE_XENOMORPH)
 
diff --git a/code/modules/character_traits/languages.dm b/code/modules/character_traits/languages.dm
index 438f6ca0ceb..af10a041d7f 100644
--- a/code/modules/character_traits/languages.dm
+++ b/code/modules/character_traits/languages.dm
@@ -45,6 +45,11 @@
 	applyable = TRUE
 	cost = 1
 
+/datum/character_trait/language/ruspatois
+	language_name = LANGUAGE_RUSPATOIS
+	applyable = TRUE
+	cost = 1
+
 /datum/character_trait/language/english
 	language_name = LANGUAGE_ENGLISH
 	applyable = TRUE
diff --git a/code/modules/mob/language/languages.dm b/code/modules/mob/language/languages.dm
index cfa023c7d9c..8b31ed779fa 100644
--- a/code/modules/mob/language/languages.dm
+++ b/code/modules/mob/language/languages.dm
@@ -46,6 +46,15 @@
 
 	syllables = list("al", "an", "bi", "vye", "vo", "go", "dye", "yel", "en", "yer", "yet", "ka", "ko", "la", "ly", "lo", "l", "na", "nye", "ny", "no", "ov", "ol", "on", "or", "slog", "ot", "po", "pr", "ra", "rye", "ro", "st", "ta", "tye", "to", "t", "at", "bil", "vyer", "yego", "yeny", "yenn", "yest", "kak", "ln", "ova", "ogo", "oro", "ost", "oto", "pry", "pro", "sta", "stv", "tor", "chto", "eto", "rus", "nar", "arya", "mol")
 
+/datum/language/patois
+	name = LANGUAGE_RUSPATOIS
+	desc = "Russian patois spoken by Eastern Europeans residing for decades within the UA and TWE. Largely incompatible with contemporary Russian."
+	speech_verb = "says"
+	color = "ruspatois"
+	key = "9"
+
+	syllables = list("che", "de", "da", "du", "yo", "yu", "ty", "yon", "ka", "ke", "don", "yed", "mas", "kyen", "no", "ua", "khe", "kha", "o", "na", "has", "ya", "yen", "tra", "blo", "kho", "est", "soi", "dos", "par", "dya", "tan", "ey", "sa", "kom", "nyo", "min", "svi", "yan", "suy", "des", "ven", "vo", "ro", "ku", "tak", "u", "ov", "so", "ri", "kab", "ten", "nos", "mi", "an", "su", "men", "ma", "dro", "li", "ak", "om", "er", "ir", "ar", "ote", "op", "ki", "to")
+
 /datum/language/german
 	name = LANGUAGE_GERMAN
 	desc = "Standard High-German, a language spoken mostly in Central Europe, and by German immigrants elsewhere."
@@ -113,7 +122,7 @@
 	ask_verb = "chimpers"
 	exclaim_verb = "screeches"
 	color = "monkey"
-	key = "9"
+	key = null
 
 /datum/language/xenomorph
 	name = LANGUAGE_XENOMORPH
@@ -203,5 +212,5 @@
 	ask_verb = "resonates"
 	exclaim_verb = "resonates"
 	color = "tajaran"
-	key = "7"
+	key = "8"
 	flags = RESTRICTED|HIVEMIND
diff --git a/code/stylesheet.dm b/code/stylesheet.dm
index 3e3a2d425b5..82eeee9dcbe 100644
--- a/code/stylesheet.dm
+++ b/code/stylesheet.dm
@@ -151,6 +151,7 @@ h1.alert, h2.alert {color: #000000;}
 .rough {font-family: trebuchet-ms, cursive, sans-serif;}
 .german {color: #858F1E; font-family: 'Times New Roman', Times, serif}
 .spanish {color: #CF982B;}
+.ruspatois {color: #258687}
 .japanese {color: #0047A0}
 .commando {color: #FE9B24; font-style: bold;}
 .say_quote {font-family: Georgia, Verdana, sans-serif;}
diff --git a/tgui/packages/tgui-panel/styles/goon/chat-dark.scss b/tgui/packages/tgui-panel/styles/goon/chat-dark.scss
index 020c4b1f728..392c1c0a360 100644
--- a/tgui/packages/tgui-panel/styles/goon/chat-dark.scss
+++ b/tgui/packages/tgui-panel/styles/goon/chat-dark.scss
@@ -1402,6 +1402,9 @@ em {
 .chinese {
   color: #fe1919;
 }
+.ruspatois {
+  color: #258687;
+}
 
 .zombie {
   color: #2dacb1;
diff --git a/tgui/packages/tgui-panel/styles/goon/chat-light.scss b/tgui/packages/tgui-panel/styles/goon/chat-light.scss
index 78b30f07b2b..6e13d394d9e 100644
--- a/tgui/packages/tgui-panel/styles/goon/chat-light.scss
+++ b/tgui/packages/tgui-panel/styles/goon/chat-light.scss
@@ -1429,6 +1429,10 @@ h2.alert {
   color: #fe1919;
 }
 
+.ruspatois {
+  color: #258687;
+}
+
 .zombie {
   color: #216163;
   font-style: italic;