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mysterymeat
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twitter is a bug
%
if ( X ) {
print "It's works";
} else if ( !X ) {
print "It's broken";
} else {
print "Why does this keep happening!?";
}
%
Keep Circulating The Tapes
%
.... This is one of those moments
%
Please don't repeat yourself
%
Hi, I'm Eliza. What is your problem?
%
Have you tried?
%
What do you think?
%
Do you dream often?
%
Do computers worry you?
%
Do you believe you are?
%
What do you think machines have to do with your problem?
%
What is it you really want to know?
%
What answer would please you most?
%
Really?
%
I don't care about names, go on.
%
Who?
%
What?
%
Why?
%
Where?
%
When?
%
How?
%
When the gods wish to punish us, they answer our prayers
%
Lovers are like bees in that they live a honeyed life
%
Whoever loves, let him flourish. Let him perish who knows not love. Let him perish twice over whoever forbids love.
%
The one who buggers a fire burns his penis
%
Love dictates to me as I write and Cupid shows me the way, but may I die if god should wish me to go on without you
%
No young buck is complete until he has fallen in love
%
The oldest and strongest emotion of mankind is fear, and the oldest and strongest kind of fear is fear of the unknown.
~ H. P. Lovecraft
%
I never ask a man what his business is, for it never interests me. What I ask him about are his thoughts and dreams.
~ H. P. Lovecraft
%
The most merciful thing in the world... is the inability of the human mind to correlate all its contents.
~ H. P. Lovecraft
%
The world is indeed comic, but the joke is on mankind.
~ H. P. Lovecraft
%
Adulthood is hell.
~ H. P. Lovecraft
%
One can never produce anything as terrible and impressive as one can awesomely hint about.
~ H. P. Lovecraft
%
Fear is our deepest and strongest emotion, and the one which best lends itself to the creation of nature-defying illusions.
~ H. P. Lovecraft
%
A small problem gets larger if you ignore it.
%
"The illegal we do immediately. The unconstitutional takes a bit longer."
― Henry Kissinger
%
"The sooner you fall behind, the more time you'll have to catch up!"
%
"There was a boy called Eustace Clarence Scrubb, and he almost deserved it."
― C. S. Lewis, The Chronicles of Narnia
%
"We have reason to believe that man first walked upright to free his
hands for masturbation."
― Lily Tomlin
%
Bullwinkle: I'd like to apply for a job as an usher?
Boris: What experience have you had?
Bullwinkle: I've been in the dark for most of my life.
%
This, cleverly disguised as a bomb, is a bomb. ~ Bullwinkle
%
Eenie meenie chili beanie, the spirits are about to speak. ~ Bullwinkle
%
You busy-bodies have busied your last body. ~ Boris
%
two quotes forward, one quote back
%
He who works with his hands is a laborer. He who works with his hands and his head is a craftsman. He who works with his hands and his head and his heart is an artist. ― Francis of Assisi
%
There has never been an unexpectedly short debugging period in the history of computers.
-- Steven Levy
%
Computer technology is so built into our lives that it's part of the surround of every artist.
-- Steven Levy
%
I think that the most beautiful thing lately hasn't been in hardware or software per se but collaboration - the idea behind Napster, which uses the distributed power of the Internet as its engine.
-- Steven Levy
%
We were promised a society of philosophers. But the Blogosphere is looking more and more like a nation of ankle-biters.
-- Steven Levy
%
The fact that biological, or 'natural' rules might help in the creation of a computer generated work of art is interesting, but even a wonderful work of art made in this fashion isn't the same as a person, with all his or her experiences and emotions involved, making art.
-- Steven Levy
%
Start by doing what's necessary; then do what's possible; and suddenly you are doing the impossible.
-- Francis of Assisi
%
Where there is charity and wisdom, there is neither fear nor ignorance.
-- Francis of Assisi
%
A single sunbeam is enough to drive away many shadows.
-- Francis of Assisi
%
While you are proclaiming peace with your lips, be careful to have it even more fully in your heart.
-- Francis of Assisi
%
No one is to be called an enemy, all are your benefactors, and no one does you harm. You have no enemy except yourselves.
-- Francis of Assisi
%
For it is in giving that we receive.
-- Francis of Assisi
%
We should never desire to be over others. Instead, we ought to be servants who are submissive to every human being for God's sake.
-- Francis of Assisi
%
It is in pardoning that we are pardoned.
-- Francis of Assisi
%
It is not fitting, when one is in God's service, to have a gloomy face or a chilling look.
-- Francis of Assisi
%
If a superior give any order to one who is under him which is against that man's conscience, although he do not obey it yet he shall not be dismissed.
-- Francis of Assisi
%
Where there is injury let me sow pardon.
-- Francis of Assisi
%
We must not be wise and prudent according to the flesh. Rather, we must be simple, humble and pure.
-- Francis of Assisi
%
Our deepest fear is that we are powerful beyond measure.
~ Marianne Williamson
%
A mathematician called Hall, │
Had a hexahedronical ball, │
And the cube of its weight, │
Times his pecker, plus eight, │
Was four fifths of five eighths of sod all.
%
"knock, knock" "who's there?" "java" "java who?" "java.lang.RuntimeException: java.lang.NullPointerException"
%
“The object in life is not to be on the side of the majority, but to escape finding oneself in the ranks of the insane.” - Marcus Aurelius, Roman Emperor
%
"It is no measure of health to be well adjusted to a profoundly sick society." - Jiddu Krishnamurti
%
"The men the American public admire most extravagantly are the most daring liars; the men they detest most violently are those who try to tell them the truth." - H. L. Mencken
%
“Even if you are a minority of one, the truth is the truth.” - Gandhi
%
"Insanity in individuals is something rare - but in groups, parties, nations and epochs, it is the rule." - Friederich Nietzsche
%
"Insanity - a perfectly rational adjustment to an insane world." - R. D. Lang
%
"Ninety-nine percent of the people in the world are fools, and the rest of us are in great danger of contagion." - Thornton Wilder
%
"The individual has always had to struggle to keep from being overwhelmed by the tribe. If you try it, you will be lonely often, and sometimes frightened. But no price is too high to pay for the privilege of owning yourself." - Friederich Nietzsche
%
"Men have been taught that it is a virtue to agree with others. But the creator is the man who disagrees. Men have been taught that it is a virtue to swim with the current. But the creator is the man who goes against the current. Men have been taught that it is a virtue to stand together. But the creator is the man who stands alone." - Ayn Rand
%
"The sick individual finds himself at home with all other similarly sick individuals. The whole culture is geared to this kind of pathology. The result is that the average individual does not experience the separateness and isolation the fully schizophrenic person feels. He feels at ease among those who suffer from the same deformation; in fact, it is the fully sane person who feels isolated in the insane society - and he may suffer so much from the incapacity to communicate that it is he who may become psychotic." - Eric Fromm, Swiss Psychologist (The Anatomy of Human Destructiveness)
%
The Parable of the Poisoned Well:
“There was once a wise king who ruled over a vast city. He was feared for his might and loved for his wisdom. Now in the heart of the city, there was a well whose waters were pure and crystalline from which the king and all the inhabitants drank. When all were asleep, an enemy entered the city and poured seven drops of a strange liquid into the well. And he said that henceforth all who drink this water shall become mad.
All the people drank of the water, but not the king. And the people began to say, "The king is mad and has lost his reason. Look how strangely he behaves. We cannot be ruled by a madman, so he must be dethroned."
The king grew very fearful, for his subjects were preparing to rise against him. So one evening, he ordered a golden goblet to be filled from the well, and he drank deeply. The next day, there was great rejoicing among the people, for their beloved king had finally regained his reason."
%
"A time will come when the whole world will go mad. And to anyone who is not mad they will say: 'You are mad, for you are not like us.'" - St. Anthony the Great (attributed to)
%
"Just look at us. Everything is backwards. Everything is upside down. Doctors destroy health, lawyers destroy justice, universities destroy knowledge, governments destroy freedom, the major media destroy information, and religion destroys spirituality." - Michael Ellner
%
Dogbert: "Reality is always controlled by the people who are most insane." - Scott Adams, Dilbert
%
"We are in the process of creating what deserves to be called the idiot culture. Not an idiot sub-culture, which every society has bubbling beneath the surface and which can provide harmless fun; but the culture itself. For the first time, the weird and the stupid and the coarse are becoming our cultural norm, even our cultural ideal." - Carl Bernstein, U.S. Journalist. Guardian (London, June 3, 1992)
%
"Whenever people agree with me I always feel I must be wrong." - Oscar Wilde
%
“Whenever you find yourself on the side of the majority, it is time to pause and reflect.” - Mark Twain
%
"Honesty is such a lonely word. Everyone is so untrue..." - Billy Joel, in his hit song Honesty
%
"Insanity is relative. It depends on who has who locked in what cage." - Ray Bradbury
%
"Beware when the great God lets loose a thinker on this planet." - Ralph Waldo Emerson
%
"We do not have to visit a madhouse to find disordered minds; our planet is the mental institution of the universe." - Johann von Goethe
%
"In a mad world, only the mad are sane." - Akiro Kurosawa
%
"What sane person could live in this world and not be crazy?" - Ursula K. LeGuin (b. 1929), US author, The Princess
%
"Our society is run by insane people for insane objectives... I think we’re being run by maniacs for maniacal ends... and I think I’m liable to be put away as insane for expressing that. That’s what’s insane about it." - John Lennon, Interview BBC-TV (June 22, 1968)
%
"The most dangerous man, to any government, is the man who is able to think things out for himself without regard to the prevailing superstitions and taboos. Almost inevitably he comes to the conclusion that the government he lives under is dishonest, insane and intolerable, and so, if he is romantic, he tries to change it. And even if he is not romantic personally he is apt to spread discontent among those who are." - H.L. Mencken
%
"In America, the criminally insane rule and the rest of us, or the vast majority of the rest of us, either do not care, do not know, or are distracted and properly brainwashed into acquiescence." - Kurt Nimmo
%
"America is an insane asylum run by the inmates." - Lester Roloff (1914-1982)
%
"When the world goes mad, one must accept madness as sanity; since sanity is, in the last analysis, nothing but the madness on which the whole world happens to agree." - George Bernard Shaw (1856-1950), British playwright
%
"The statistics on sanity are that one out of every four Americans is suffering from some form of mental illness. Think of your three best friends. If they are okay, then it's you." - Rita Mae Brown
%
“I think the reward for conformity is that everyone likes you except yourself.” - Rita Mae Brown
%
"The trouble with the rat race is that even if you win, you're still a rat." - Lily Tomlin (1939 - ), Actress
%
"It is dangerous to be right when the government is wrong." - Voltaire
%
"Sometimes I think that the greatest sign that there is intelligent life somewhere in the universe is that it hasn't tried to contact us yet." - Bill Watterson, Calvin and Hobbes
%
"If human beings were shown what they're really like, they'd either kill one another as vermin, or hang themselves." - Aldous Huxley, Author of A Brave New World
%
"They must find it difficult...those who have taken authority as the truth, rather than truth as the authority." - Gerald Massey
%
“Devotion to the truth is the hallmark of morality; there is no greater, nobler, more heroic form of devotion than the act of a man who assumes the responsibility of thinking.” - Ayn Rand, Atlas Shrugged
%
The Nerdus Americanis (also known as Computerus Hackerus) creature has only five states: Sleeping, Eating, Waiting-for-a- Computer, Programming, and Debugging. Its behavior is cyclic: After it sleeps it always eats, after it eats it always waits for a computer, and so on, until after debugging it goes back to sleep for a while.
%
I forget that Bologna is a real place
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I’m so relieved I feel like I just meditated for a thousand hours
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I didn't fix the internet for this.
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I have a memory bank of meat related memories I store in the "meat cloud"
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Sometimes I feel like a question
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It's happy hour somewhere.
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The master has failed more than the novice has even tried
%
Why do you even think that I'm drunk? What the heck pal!?
%
"Knowledge is power" ~ Francis Bacon
%
They say the only thing that can be learned from history is that nothing can be learned from history. This is patently wrong. Firstly, the person with the weirdest thing on top of his head usually runs the show. Secondly, in order to gain power and might one has to have a pure heart and massive double standards.
%
If you look up, all you see is asses
%
"Things fall apart; the centre cannot hold" -- WB Yeats
"Things fall apart - it's scientific" -- David Byrne
"Science sucks. Let's go break something" -- Beavis and Butt-head
%
"Things fall apart; the centre cannot hold" -- WB Yeats
%
"Things fall apart - it's scientific" -- David Byrne
%
"Science sucks. Let's go break something" -- Beavis and Butt-head
%
Three Laws of Conspiracy Theorists:
1. Authority is untrue by default
2. Anti-authority is always right
3. All theories that contradict 1 or 2 are part of the Conspiracy
%
PCMCIA -> people can't memorize computer industry acronyms
%
To be patriotic, hate all nations but your own; to be religious, all sects but your own; to be moral, all pretenses but your own. -- Lionel Strachey
%
The history of humanity is the history of the underestimation of rats
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Cigarettes are like squirrels: They're perfectly harmless unless you put one in your mouth and set it on fire.
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"The young man knows the rules, but the old man knows the exceptions." - Oliver Wendell Holmes, Sr.
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Fact: Spell check is lizard people trying to undermine our language
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"You miss 100% of the shots you don't take - Wayne Gretzky" -Michael Scott
%
There are two ways to slice easily thorugh life; to believe everything or to doubt everything. Both ways save us from thinking.
~ Alfred Korzybski
%
God may forgive your sins, but your nervous system won't.
~ Alfred Korzybski
%
Whatever you say it is, it isn't.
~ Alfred Korzybski
%
Two important characteristics of maps should be noticed. A map is not the territory it represents, but, if correct, it has a similar structure to the territory, which accounts for its usefulness.
~ Alfred Korzybski
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If words are not things, or maps are not the actual territory, then, obviously, the only possible link between the objective world and the linguistic world is found in structure, and structure alone.
~ Alfred Korzybski
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Thus, we see that one of the obvious origins of human disagreement lies in the use of noises for words.
~ Alfred Korzybski
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If a psychiatric and scientific inquiry were to be made upon our rulers, mankind would be appalled at the disclosures.
~ Alfred Korzybski
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Most intellectual people do not believe in God, but they fear him just the same.
~ Wilhelm Reich
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Only the liberation of the natural capacity for love in human beings can master their sadistic destructiveness.
~ Wilhelm Reich
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The fact that political ideologies are tangible realities is not a proof of their vitally necessary character. The bubonic plague was an extraordinarily powerful social reality, but no one would have regarded it as vitally necessary.
~ Wilhelm Reich
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Honest pioneer work in the field of science has always been, and will continue to be, life's pilot. On all sides, life is surrounded by hostility. This puts us under an obligation.
~ Wilhelm Reich
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Love, work, and knowledge are the wellsprings of our lives, they should also govern it.
~ Wilhelm Reich
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Scientific theory is a contrived foothold in the chaos of living phenomena.
~ Wilhelm Reich
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The few bad poems which occasionally are created during abstinence are of no great interest.
~ Wilhelm Reich
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someday programming languages will come in spray cans
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Ask not "why is the method unused", ask "what use is the method".
%